i. ii. iii.
this shits hard
▰theme

kleine-asbar:

Protip: Marijuana is probably the drug least likely to make you murder your entire family with an axe. Like that sounds like a lot of work.

nativeandnaive:

legendxofxzach:

One time during my freshmen year of college I forgot to do a history paper that was worth 20% of my grade and the teacher didn’t accept late work, so I waited until the professor handed back the papers and angrily asked where mine was. The teacher felt so bad for losing it he let me re-do the entire paper and gave me an A-

You fucking champ

Do puns physically hurt you?
- Anonymous

bewbin:

bombing:

bewbin:

bombing:

every pun I see shaves about 12 years off my total life span and also it’s illegal to make them around me

Wow that’s some severe pun-ishment

ARGHHHHH

dont say argh. pirate speak is addictive and you’ll get hooked